Cry Me a River

Alright...so the biggest knock against me and my blog is that "I'm too nice". I get criticized for trying to be "politically correct", mainly from the Angry Umpire, but from other kickball enthusiasts as well. Truth be told, I like writing about all the teams, not just the top teams. I'm not down to bash teams, because that ain't my game. I'm not a really good shit talker like my buddy the Angry Umpire. However I will tell you one thing that really pisses me off, anyone who cries about why the lost and won't simply own it. Some players will come up with ANY excuse to "explain" why they lost. Anything to draw attention away from the fact that they just didn't execute or more simply... they suck.

A couple of my favorite excuse:

"We didn't have all our players"

Really?!!? I don't care what anyone says, one player does NOT make a team. Of course there are certain players that are considerably better than the rest of the team, but unless that player is playing all the positions (Ala Baseball Bugs Bunny) then it shouldn't matter. Your team is only as good as it's weakest player!!!




"The umpires robbed us"

This is probably the excuse that gets to me the most, mainly because I do a lot of umpiring. I've been lucky enough to see a game from both sides of the plate. And I'll be the first to admit that the umpires don't always make the right calls, but that is understandable...because they are f*#$king robots. We don't have instant replay here. These guys and gals are going to call what the see and that's just how it goes. Even if something is ridiculously obvious, if they didn't see it, they can't just take your word for it. This applies in ALL sports, in any sport. Does it suck? Yeah sometimes it does, but that's when you need to turn around and make a play. Don't cry, don't sulk, cowboy or cowgirl up, turn around and make a play. If you need to beat the team you are playing and the umpires, then DO IT! Just stop crying.....


Competition often brings out the worst in us, but at the end of the day...this isn't life or death. Kickball is game, not a sport. Let's treat it like one!

Week 4 Recap

There was a good amount of hype surrounding Week 4. I know many kickballers were anxious to see how the night would end...

The number one ranked Confused Kixxx were able to keep their #1 spot by barely slipping by Tu Sabes. Although Tu Sabes gave them trouble early on, by scoring first blood quickly, Coach Vinny "Give Me A Hug" Trujillo said, "they had us on our heals for most of the game". However Kixxx was able to comeback in the bottom of the 4th and shut down Tu Sabes's hope of an upset. With that Tu Sabes falls 4 spots from #5 all the way down to #9 and is coming dangerously close to slipping out of the Top Ten altogether.


The Mighty Unicorns of LTA had the most favorable match-up of the night, as they went up against the sinking Multiple Scoregasms. As anticipated, they beat the Scoregasms with a
10-0 smack down and earned themselves second place in their division with an undefeated record of 3-0. In addition, the 10-run shut-out helped them in the Power Rankings and brought them up 3 spots from #6 in the league to the #3 team in SCK.


The Drunken Monkeyz dealt a decisive blow to the Kick N Da Balls crew by shutting them out
7-0. The worst part for KNDB is they now find themselves out of the Top Ten by slipping down from the #8 spot to the #11 spot. However on a lighter note, this made room for the Billy Bad Asses to make their first appearance in the Top Ten by holding the #10 spot. The Bad Asses took down the After School Specials by a score of 5-0.


The Shockers took a huge tumble this week after losing to the #5 Warriors. The Warriors were able to shut out the Shockers with a 3-0 score. The Shockers lose their #2 ranking and plummet down to #6.

The new tenants of the #2 spot are the New Kicks on the Block, which is odd considering they squeaked by the 0-4 Violet Femmes with a head scratching 3-0 final score. However even after that lack luster performance, the overall stats are still in their favor and pushed them up to #2.

Overall a very nice Week 4...

No Clue

The Angry Umpire really has no clue about kickball. His expertise on kickball is very limited and it's obvious when you read his blogs. When he isn't spending time randomly bashing teams, he is blogging about the same teams over and over and over and over....at nausea. He would have you believe it's because the other teams don't deserve the blog space. The truth is, his overall knowledge of kickball prevents him from making any real predictions.

There are important match-ups this week that will help some very desperate teams get out of the cellar. More importantly and simply, these same teams need to win or they will be missing the Week 8 non-division games. The last team in each division will not playing during Week 8.

Billy Bad Asses v.s After School Specials

The After School Specials have yet to pick up their first win in their SCK rookie season. They have had the unfortunate luck of playing some tough teams during their opening games. During Week 1, they happened to pull the #1 Confused Kixxx, who gave them a baptism under-fire with a 13-1 clobbering. Then LTA took their turn and gave ASS a tolerable spanking with a 1-5 loss. Finally after all that, it looks like the may have a chance at picking up their first win against the Billy Bad Asses.

The Billy Bad Asses made a huge statement last season when they upset the ever tough Shockers. During that part of season, they were playing their best kickball ever. Much of that momentum carried over into the post-season King of Kickball tourney were they did very well. However for whatever reason that momentum and that same spark didn't carry over into this season. I find it odd, becuase they have all the elements you need to win games. They have the personnel in place, but it's all about executing. They did pick up one win this season so far, but it was against the Multiple Scoregasms; who by all accounts are falling apart at the seems. The final score was 1-0 and the one run in that game is all the Badasses have been able to muster so far this season. In addition, they have been plagued by player absences all season, but I hear that situation has finally sorted itself out. Flat out...they need to win Wednesday to gain some sort of momentum that will hopefully propel them through the rest of the season.

Billy Bad Asses - 6

After School Specials - 2

Las Mataconchas v.s. Pitches B Crazy

Las Mataconchas is another team who has been a victim of circumstance. So far they have played the #2 Shockers, # 8 Kick N Da Balls, and the # 9 Drunken Monkeyz. During that three game gruesome gauntlet, they gave up 40 runs and were only able to earn 5 runs. That is a brutal schedule to start the season with and it is apparent why they have yet to pick up a win. Their next opponent is the rookie squad Pitches B Crazy, who should give them a more fair playing ground and an opportunity to chalk up their first "W".

Pitches B Crazy is another team who started the season with an unfavorable schedule. They had to tangle with the #2 Shockers and then soon after that, they ran into the Warriors who know how to play some kickball. Not only is Pitches B Crazy looking for their first win, but they are also looking to score their first RUN. However when compared to Las Mataconchas, they have given up considerably far less runs - specifically 15 runs total to be exact.

I think the biggest factor here is Pitches B Crazy are coming off a bye-week, so they may be a tad bit rusty. While Las Mataconchas just finished getting stomped by the Monkeyz...translation - Las Mataconchas are angry, hungry, and they aren't going to take it anymore. EVERY WEEK!

Las Mataconchas - 5

Pitches B Crazy - 1

Watch Out Now!

Week 3 had some eventful games, but one team that is really starting to shine is team Tu Sabes. I'm hearing a lot of good things from the folks down at Jimmy O regarding this team.

Now I have yet to see them play, but their box scores are showing some promise and some of the kickball enthusiasts are telling me this squad looks promising. During Week 1, they won their first game of the season with a nice score of 8-1 over the Multiple Scoregasms. They had a Bye-Week during Week 2, but they came right back during Week 3 and rang up another win over the After School Specials with another nice 8-2 victory. However their next game will be the true test for this team. They are going to be matched up against the #1 Confused Kixxx.

The Confused Kixxx are coming off of an absolutely HUGE win with a 18-0 massacre over a short handed 8-player Scoregasms team. During Week 1, they had another blow out win against the rookie team After School Specials with a 13-1 final score. However Week 3 for Kixxx was a bit telling, as they ran into a good 1 More Shot team and almost dropped one. However almost only counts in horse-shoes and hand grenades. Kixxx was able to pull away in the late innings with a final score of 5-3. They have all the parts they need to win. They have talent, experience, and teamwork. In addition to all that, now they have momentum going into Week 4.

Come Wednesday Tu Sabes will have their chance to upset the #1 Confused Kixxx. Will it happen? Honestly, probably not... But hell what do I know. Last season when the Billy Badasses upset the Shockers it showed all us kickballers that on any given Wednesday, anything can happen. We will just have to wait and see.

Happy Kicking!

It's Showtime

We are slowly turning into Week 3, the King of Kickball prospects are starting to rise to the top. This week will give some teams an opportunity to shine and see if they are really worth all the early season hype.

One More Shot v.s. Los Totally Awesomes

LTA is pushing hard to show they are true contenders this season and I love them for it. Romo, Chucky, and the Team Leader are my guys, they are showing that LTA has what it takes to win. Unfortunately for them they just ran into the new and improved One More Shot. During Week 3, One More Shot really showed they are a good solid looking team. They had the #1 Confused Kixxx shaking in their boots last Wednesday. You just know after this very close game and after Kixxx's 2o min post-game ritual of berating the umpires, they had to change their shorts. One More Shot lost by a very respectable score of 5-3. That being said, if they were able to keep up with #1 Kixxx, they should be able to easily manhandle LTA.

Los Totally Awesomes - 3

One More Shot - 6

The Shockers v.s Kick N Da Balls

This match-up is actually starting to turn into a little rivalry. However with all the turn-over that KNDB has seen, the Shocks aren't playing the same kickbal kiddo crew. KNDB is no longer the kiddos of the league. They are just a regular team like all the rest. Now that doesn't mean they can't play, because they can. They just blend in a bit more now. Also they are sporting a surprising 2-0 record, but that is quickly going to change come Wednesday. As much as it pains me to say this, the Shockers are back! Plain and simple. They are embarrassing teams be scoring into the double digits and shutting teams out. Looks like it's time to dust off that target and put it right where it belongs...on the Shocker's back.

Shockers - 8

KNDB - 4

Warriors v.s Hash House Harriers

The Warriors are a team that has been flying under the radar. If you listen to Rick "The 3-Second Fuse" he swears up and down that this team will be strong contenders for the King of Kickball title. He says he knows this team from that dark, scary place I call Thursday nights! One a side note, there have actually been some SCKers claiming they may venture into that desolate waste land that is Thursday night. They promise to slay all that is unholy and evil for the sake and in the name of all that is right and just in the kickball universe!!! But I digress...so the Warriors look to be a good team. However they are going up against the new Upset Alert squad the Hash House Harriers. Now comes a true test for these drinkers with a running problem. As long as Hoser doesn't kill the umpires, the Harriers just might have a chance...

Warriors - 1

Hash House Harriers - 3

It's a Conspiracy!!!!

No, it's not a conspiracy! Although you would think it was by all the questions, comments, or better yet complaints I've been getting. Some of the SCK Nation is questioning on why there was no follow up on the Drunken Monkeyz v.s. Hash House Harriers last week. Well the answer to that is quite simple.

Everyone knows I play for the Monkeyz, it's no secret. So when I sit down to write these small tales of kickball woe, I make it a point not to write about the Monkeyz unless absolutely necessary. Truth be told, I find it difficult to write about my own teams or even have a good grasp on a game if Im actually playing in it. You can't really see the whole picture. You don't get to witness the small details that make a good posting.

And besides that, Im lucky enough to have a Ying to my Yang. I knew the Angry Umpire would jump all over this great match-up. Especially since he was one of the Monkeyz number one fans. The lack of posting on It's Just Kickball wasn't meant to take anything away from the Hash House Harriers or fail to give them their due credit, far from it. I just had great confidence that they would get their nod and deserved kudos from the Angry Umpire blog.

However since I'm on the subject, I think the Harriers really stepped it up. Some might disagree and say a tie is like kissing your sister, but you have to consider that these quilt wearing drunkards are really improving. They are probably going to surprise some folks. Now the Monkeyz...I don't know. I think we will be fine, but then again, Im on the inside looking out. See what I mean....

Good Luck folks and Happy Kicking

The Balls & Dolls May Get the Runs!

Now we all know the Balls & Dolls have been playing SCK kickball for four seasons. They have always had the experience, the talent, and the teamwork to make a run at the King of Kickball title. However of late, they just haven't been unable to do so,but... this just might be the season they get it done.

The Balls & Dolls were able to past their first "real" test of the season be taking down the disheartened I'd Hit It squad. The final score was a close 3-1 ball game, the Bs&Ds didn't show much offense; however they aren't really known for their offense. Their claim to fame has to be and is their defense. Which is odd, because you wouldn't look out on that field and automatically figure them for a stone wall defense, but unbelievably they do in fact have a very strong defense.

This week the Balls & Dolls are running up against a good rookie contender, The Runs. The Runs are in their rookie season and they currently sport a 1-1-0 record with a +5 Power Ranking, which is results from 6 runs scored and 1 point allowed. The tied last week against another good rookie contender the New Kicks on the Block. I've seen The Runs play twice now and they are the real deal, at least as real as a rookie team can be.

This Wednesday's bout between the Balls & Dolls and the Runs should be a good one. The end results will tell us one of two things; 1. The Balls & Dolls are on course and playing like contenders or 2.) The Runs are in fact the real deal and may possibly dominate Group C.

This one is too close to call, but I have to go with experience on this one.....

Balls & Dolls - 4
The Runs - 2

Good Luck and Happy Kicking

Group C = No Offense

They say defense wins championships, which is fairly true. However a team still needs to have the ability to score runs or at least have some sort of an offense to speak of.

All the teams in Group C are struggling to score runs, which results in very slow almost sleepy games. Even the two veteran teams in Group C, the Bs&Ds and I'd Hit It, have yet to take advantage of the lack luster competition found at Modesto 1. Even the two promising rookie teams, the Runs and the New Kicks on the Block, aren't heavy on the offensive side of the ball. It seems as though no one can score any runs down on the field. Maybe it's the field? Who knows... The one thing I do know is that come playoff time, if any of the Group C teams run into teams from Group A or B, they won't be able to keep up with the offense.

Another thing to note is that the lack of offense out of Group C has nothing to do with their concrete defense or intense competition. They aren't running into any awesome pitching either. They just flat out don't have any offense. Hopefully things change in the coming weeks, because if they don't...well I wouldn't expect to see any of the Group C teams in the championship game.

Double Take

The highly anticipated Week 1 is now in the books! Some teams continued on with their winning and dominating ways, while other teams are still struggling to put wins on the board. There were also a couple of teams that surprised everyone and will absolutely finish higher than previously predicted.

The Runs, out of Group C, looked solid Wednesday night. They have tons of skill and potential . Once they combine that talent with some experience, they will indeed become a force to be reckoned with. The pre-season break down had them finishing 4th in their division, but after watching them play their first game, they have a decent chance at winning their division or maybe at the very least securing 2nd.

Another team out of Group C, that was a total surprise, were The New Kicks on the Block. The pre-season scouting report on this team was all wrong. Apparently they aren't a team of older family members, but a group of young, strong talent. Even more interesting is nobody on the team is taller than 5ft. I don't know if this was intentional or merely coincidental. This team will absolutely make the playoffs, so watch out!

There are also a couple of teams down at Jimmy O that have really caught my eye. One those teams is One More Shot. They are my sleeper pick for the Summer, you can expect them to kick all sorts of ass this season. All this team was missing from previous seasons was a tad bit more kicking muscle. Now they found that much needed boost and they are on their way.

The other Jimmy O team that is looking good is team Tu Sabes. The really struggled last season as a rookie team, but it seems they have finally worked through their rookie jitters. They were looking strong near the end of last season and have continued that trend into this Summer Season. Another team you can expect to see in the playoffs.

These teams may surprise some of the more veteran, established SCK teams. I would be very careful not to over look any of these teams.

Good Luck and Happy Kicking!

Opening Day ! Game Lines!

It's finally here! Where the metal meets the meat! The wait is finally over! And as each team gears for their first game, the story starts to unfold....

The kickball mercenaries or better known as Confused Kixxx, are going up against a rookie team for their first match-up. The After School Specials are indeed a rookie team but they have been putting in some good practice hours. However they are competing against an opponent who has way too much experience for them to keep up with. Sorry kiddos but this won't even be close....

Confused Kixxx - 14
After School Specials - 0


Out of all the kickball rookies I hear The Runs are the real deal. They are playing against three season veterans, the Violet Femmes. The Femmes have come a VERY long way from the days at Lafayette. Should be a close one, but I think The Runs just might get the upset against the SCK vets.


The Runs - 5
Violet Femmes - 3

The rest of the Opening Day schedule looks wide open. Should be a very interesting night! Good Luck to all the team and Happy Kicking!

Here are the rest of the Week 1 -Game Day Lines - Betting Window Open!

Favorite -/+ Underdog

One More Shot -2

v.s.

Billy Bad Asses +2

Tu Sabes Even

v.s

Multiple Scoregasms Even

Confused Kixxx - 14

v.s

After School Specials +14

Shockers - 6

v.s

Mataconchas +6

Warriors - 2

v.s

Pitches B Crazy +2

Kick N Da Balls Even

v.s

Hash House Harriers Even

The Runs - 2

v.s

Violet Femmes +2

Balls & Dolls - 5

v.s.

Red Hot Cherry Poppers +5

Beavers & Balls - 4

v.s.

New Kicks on the Block +4

Group C - Break Down

And last but not least the Group C break down. This division is lead by two veteran teams, the Balls & Dolls and team I'd Hit It. Both of these teams should do well; however I do have my concerns about team I'd Hit It. The rest of the division is pretty much up for grabs. It looks to be a promising group with some hopefully exciting games. Group C is the hardest division to gauge by far.

I'd Hit It has always been an all-around good team. They are solid on both sides of the ball. They are led by SCK funny guy and two-time Sportsmanship Award winner Lucas Quimiro. They should do well this season, hopefully. My only concern is their lack of interest in kickball this upcoming Summer Season. They have been swept up in the life that is hashing. The I'd Hit It leadership, the Quimiro Kids, have fallen in love with the El Paso Hash House Harriers (http://www.elpasohash.com/). The Hash House Harriers also play in SCK. I'd Hit It is usually a team that practices frequently and tries to scrimmage whenever possible. However that sense of urgency has quickly fallen by the wayside. Although seemingly unmotivated, they should still finish at the top of their division.

The Balls & Dolls are always in the hunt for a King of Kickball title. Aside from their coaching change, not much has changed. They are returning most of their players with a couple of upgrades. They have been practicing and playing scrimmages regularly. They should win their division or at the very least finish second.

The Violet Femmes have been getting better and better with each passing season. During the spring season post-season tourney, the Femmes gave the Balls & Dolls the scare of their lives when they played a very close game and almost upset the Bs & Ds. I don't know if the Femmes have recruited any more players, but if they return a majority of their squad they should do just fine.

The Beavers and Balls, I hear, have totally upgraded by recruiting some real talent. They had a so-so rookie season and are hoping to turn all that around. Other than that not much is known.

Two former Shocker players have created a new team, the New Kicks on the Block. My understanding is that this team is primarily made up of family members. Understandably they probably aren't looking to make a real competitive run for the King of Kickball title. More than likely kickball is more of a family activity for them.

The two remaining teams the Red Hot Cherry Poppers and The Runs. RHCP are returning for their second season. Their rookie season was full of mishap and they were still getting to know the game. Hopefully now that they have some experience they should be much better. The Runs I truly know nothing about. They are a rookie team so we are going to have to wait and see how they do.

Well that's it folks....Happy Kicking and Good Luck

Group C Final Predictions

1. I'd Hit It

2. Balls & Dolls

3. Beavers & Balls

4. The Runs

5. Violet Femmes

6. Red Hot Cherry Poppers

7. New Kicks on the Block

Break Down - Group B

Group B should be the easiest division to break down. Aside from the defending champs, Drunken Monkeyz, and the defunct Shocker Nation the rest of the division is pretty much up for grabs.

Kick N Da Balls is in a tough spot. I know they have been putting in some decent practice hours, but I don't know if that will be enough. Don't get me wrong, they have some good, talented players but I don't feel like they have put it all together quite yet. Word on the street is teams are already actively trying to recruit some of KNDB's reaming talent for next season. I'm worried for them. I see them maybe picking up a couple of wins at the most, hopefully they will surprise us all.


The Mataconchas, formerly the Family Jewelz and part of the "Original Six", are coming into this season with confidence. Other than that, I have absolutely no read on them since the don't practice or scrimmage, which is the way it should be. They were decent last season and we won't know much about them til they are start playing some games.


The Hash House Harriers were the last team to jump on the SCK train as it left the station for the Summer Season. They had a truly rough rookie season during the spring. Like all kickball newbies they made the mistake of thinking, "Kickball?!?!? How hard could it be?" Now they know the answer to that question and plan to come into the Summer Season with their eye on the prize. They are the sexiest team in the league. If they can generate some momentum this summer, WATCH OUT!


Pitches B Crazy are a rookie, fresh meat team. Just by chance I ran into them a couple of weeks ago putting in some kickball practice. They look to be mostly younger folks with speed and potential. However inexperience is what always makes rookie teams struggle. The Shockers and Monkeyz will absolutely tear them to pieces, but they might be able to scrounge up some wins with such a wide open division. However you never know, they might surprise us all.


Last but not least are the Warriors. They are another Thursday night league team that is making the jump to SCK. I vaguely remember this team from when I used to play on Thursday nights, before I was conveniently and arbitrarily banned. I remember them being decent, but I'm sure much has changed since then. The one thing I do know is some Thursday night teams don't mess around. They came to play, which means they came to win, to make a statement. Either that of they are longing for the greener pastures of SCK. Either way, competition wise we will soon find out what they have to offer, but Im hearing good things. Great things.

Final Predictions

1. Drunken Monkeyz

2. Shockers

3. Warriors

4. Mataconchas

5. Hash House Harriers

6. KNDB

7. Pitches B Crazy